The day he walked out, he packed two leather suitcases and set them by the front door like he was leaving for a business trip, not breaking apart half a century.
My doctor told me my heart needed surgery.
I was sitting at the kitchen table with my chipped blue teacup between my hands when Walter placed the card beside it.
"There's $2,000 in there, Sylvie," he said.
I stared at the card. "For what?"
"Emergencies."
"Fifty years together, and I get emergency money? Wow."
His jaw tightened. "Don't make this ugly, Sylvie."
I looked at the suitcases, then at his coat, then at the driveway, where Marcy's red car waited.
"There's $2,000 in there, Sylvie."
Marcy was the woman from the book club Walter had suddenly started attending every Thursday.
"No, Walter," I said. "You already did that."
"I don't want you struggling, hon."
I laughed once. It sounded older and sadder than I felt.
"You should have thought of that before you traded me in for her."
At the door, he patted his pockets, searching.
"Your blood pressure pills, Walter," I said.
"I don't want you struggling, hon."
He turned.
"They're on the counter."
For a second, shame crossed his face. Then he tucked the bottle into his pocket and left.
I waited until Marcy's car pulled away before I took the bank card and put it in the cookie tin above the stove.
Then I washed my teacup by hand because once I started crying, I was afraid I wouldn't stop.
Shame crossed his face.
For five years, I learned how to stretch grocery money, fix a running toilet with a video on my phone, and smile when people at church asked if I was "adjusting."
Adjusting sounded so polite.
My children called often.
Adele always listened too closely.
"Mama, you sound tired."
"I'm seventy-four," I told her. "Tired comes with the receipt."
Jeremiah tried and failed.
My children called often.
"Need me this weekend?"
"For what?"
"Nothing. Just to check the gutters. I heard we're expecting some rain."
